I’ve had to do a lot of starting over with things, and that’s okay. Starting over is good. It’s cleansing; it’s neccesary. You hear these stories of how the wife takes everything, down to the last fork. I wasn’t that wife..I didn’t want any reminders, I didn’t want anything that wasn’t ‘fresh’ and ‘mine’. So, even though it means I’ve had to spend a lot of money I’d really rather not have to, I have new dishes, new silverware, a new bed, a new couch..and it’s mine, with no memories attached. It also means I have empty walls – no more gorgeous artwork that was collected over the years. But, again that’s how I wanted it. Starting over; all the way.
Along with all this purging of my house, went all the tools. Not that I used them very often, but if I needed a hammer, I knew I could run down to the basement and grab a hammer. If I needed a screwdriver for some reason, again I knew where to find it. This morning, I decided it was time to address the absence of tools. I have shit to hang and I need some tools! The girls and I headed out to Home Depot, formerly known as “the Daddy store”. On the way, we were talking about what it was we needed to get and Hannah very perceptively pointed out that you know, we shouldn’t call this the Daddy store anymore. I’m like, you’re right…maybe we should just call it the tool store? She said no, we’ll call it the Mommy store. Hannah has watched me morph and change from someone who used to say, ‘mmm, no we can’t do that – Daddy needs to do that’ – to, ‘pfft, of course Mommy can do this – here, watch and learn’. I’m proud of that. I’m proud of what I’m teaching these girls.
So, we’re in the store and the first thing I see is duct tape. I grab some and toss it in the cart mumbling something about gotta have duct tape. Hannah overheard me and was like, what? What do you use duct tape for? I told her, everything. I’m pretty sure duct tape fixes everything, and I’m pretty sure we need some. Then we moved on to tools and rulers, and levels, and even a cute little bucket thing to hold them all in. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t have a cute receptacle for all this. I may not know exactly how to use all these new tools of mine, but they’ll at least look good in their storage spot.
We’re at the checkout and the gal who is ringing me up says something to the girls about, “oh are you guys shopping for Daddy?” Hannah, bless her heart – said no..these are Mommy’s tools. I looked at the cashier gal who then clearly realized her error and looked uncomfortable and unsure of what to say next, so I just smiled and said, “Yep, these are Mommy’s tools.”
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